I write a good bit - it helps me to organize and develop my thoughts. I mostly write on things I want to improve and usually are notes on scrap paper. But sometimes some topics form together so that I’m led do more with them. Writing and trying to understanding more surely doesn’t translate to being better at living it out, but it helps me to do better when I call it out.
As I’ve written before in ‘Why I Run’ blog, I’m a long time addicted runner. Running has so many benefits for me, especially mentally. Since writing on it last, I keep seeing how my life parallels a run. One instance is in running I seem to never realize when I’m running down hill or with the wind at my back, but I can’t help but registering the slightest grade up or breeze in my face. As in life, it’s so easy for all my attention to go to the challenges and not leave any for the beauty and good things. Another parallel makes it clear to me that doing difficult things is worthwhile.
It’s easy to get caught up in my run times and let them reflect how much I’ve tried. For me, the true measure of whether I’ve pushed it is I’m a little woozy for a minute at the end. To get there, I have to run at gasping for air an extended time – it’s difficult, it’s not natural, it’s not fun, and my mind has so many tricks to slow me down. On days I don’t give it my all and push it, I feel like I’ve wasted time and the run does nothing for me. But, when all comes together and I really push, the more positive, balanced, and peace I feel all day long. And, I have more energy.
The farm has given me so many opportunities to push hard: early mornings, late nights, no days off, troubleshooting galore, literally running around the farm and driving faster than I should to accommodate schedules. It’s not natural for me to have to push so much, nor fun. My instinct when faced with such challenges is to get frustrated, which is a major drag on my attitude. But when I do the hard stuff and do it with acceptance, at the end of the day, I feel quite accomplished and amazed that I have gotten so much done. It feels good.
It’s not natural to want to do difficult things, and we have ways to avoid them and show our displeasure. Children want it easy and don’t fully appreciate the big picture. As adults, there’s a lot of re-training to do to see how the best of life doesn’t necessarily come from an easy one.
The lives that impress me are the ones of perseverance and determination, not coasting, and at the end of my life, I want mine to resemble the former. In my running and my work, accepting ahead of time that difficulty can be worthwhile, that harder can be better, and that the more I give, the more I get helps me to have a lot more peace and a lot more fun with whatever comes my way.